How does a day go from being great to being absolutely shite?
Yesterday started as a great day. Daughter had her math tutor come for an hour (thank you Capt. Awesome) and then I left to go and visit a friend on the absolute other side of Mersin. Making this trip is like going from Palm Beach to Campbelltown but doing it on public transport. I had a great day though, sitting in the sun, wandering past antiquities (I will get to that another day) before having a beer and nibblies on the beachfront.
Upon my return though I walked into absolute bedlam. My sister in law had come from Adana for the weekend and brought her two kids with her. Daughter has had a difficult time with connecting with these cousins but yesterday it seemed all the kids were playing together nicely until an older cousin turned up. The first thing that came out of Miss Bitchy-pants mouth was a snide comment and it put Daughter’s back up. Immediately the shite hit the fan.
Having a big family is really great for Daughter. Being surrounded by people who love her (well except for Miss Bitchy-pants) is a good thing for a child who grew up with no extended family but I have got to be honest with you – it is doing my feking head in! My frustration levels are going through the roof with the yelling and arguments, the trials and the tears but the worst part of the whole evening was The Turk.
The Turk gets agitated incredibly easily. If things don’t go according to his thought pattern he can become quite the asshole. I have come to recognise his moods and usually put him in his place quite quickly but unfortunately the rest of his family have not yet re-familiarised themselves with the warning signs. Living here in Mersin there is always something that gets him agitated because he is surrounded by people all the time and frankly as much as I love living here the evenings have become quite unpleasant, to say the least.
My issue is that The Turk (other than his raging temper) is that always takes his family’s side on any issue with Daughter. He never sticks up for her. He never says, “it’s OK Daughter, I know you were not at fault. I will speak to Miss Bitchy-pants parents or speak to Miss Bitchy-pants herself.” Never. It kills me. Witnessing him take Miss Bitchy-pants side every single time over Daughters breaks my heart because it breaks her heart.
I walked out last night. We were supposed to have a BBQ (which was moved to Songul’s home due to the chaos that was taking place in our home). I walked for quite some time. I had nowhere to go but I knew if I stayed I was going to stay something that I would ultimately regret, and not to The Turk (I never regret anything I say to him).
This morning is a new day. A bright day (well it is raining but my point remains the same). Today I will not be drawn into the family drama. I did make a suggestion to Daughter though, “Next time Miss Bitchy-pants says something nasty write it down and hand it back to her. Every single time. It might irritate her, she might screw it up and throw it at you but she might also read it and realise that she is being mean. And remember Daughter – deep breaths, keep taking deep breaths.”