Have a dose of what life is really like living here – from my single-handed destruction of the Turkish language, random arguments with random relatives about everything from apples to vaginas to learning the secrets to making the perfect içli köfte! Highs or lows this is my observations from the melting pot of crazy that is my life in Mersin.
Seriously. I was sitting at my desk this morning writing an email and I swear I could smell bacon. Thinking about bacon right now is making me drool. Literally drool. God I miss bacon.
Bacon is without doubt the best food on earth. There are not many foods that can evoke this type of enthusiasm from me this early in the morning but bacon definitely takes this prize. So versatile that it can be used for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It can be eaten on its own or adding it to anything else will only enhance the original dishes flavour. Salad? Yep throw in some bacon. Roasts? Spread bacon across that bad boy sizzling away. Sandwiches? Burgers? Omelettes? What can’t bacon improve? God I miss bacon.
I don’t miss pork. Never a big fan. I do love crackling though. God I miss bacon.
Ham. I miss ham. I miss The Turk’s pizza. His pizza was seriously the best pizza in Sydney. I miss ham and God I miss bacon.
I thought I had tracked down some ham at Migros a couple of days back. They were selling Jambon which means ham in English. Nearly wet myself. After examining the packet I still thought it was ham. I got it home. I was wrong. It was beef ham? WTF?? God I miss ham and God I miss bacon.
There is a piggery in Antalya I could go to. Antalya is, I think, a 6 hour drive from here (but 30 minutes on a plane). Would that seem excessive? To jump on a plane to purchase bacon? Would I bring it back as hand luggage? Would they even let me bring it on the plane? God I miss bacon.
I hate bacon jokes. I hate bacon meme’s. They are cruel. They are everywhere. Every time I open any social media a joke or a photo of bacon appears. It is akin to torture for a person in my peril. God I miss bacon.
The Turk tells me I am being overly dramatic. Yes, yes I am. God I miss bacon.
Today is Wednesday. To many of you it is Christmas Day but here it is just Wednesday. Daughter has been negotiating with The Turk all week to have the day off school and last night, finally, The Turk gave in. No school on Christmas Day (sorry I mean Wednesday).
I woke up this morning (Wednesday) feeling grumpy. This was my first Christmas away from Australia, away from my ancestral roots but, of course, I have had many Wednesday’s away from Australia so if I keep thinking about it that way it’s not so bad. I intended today to be a day of wallowing in my grief, to lie on the couch and watch Christmas movies (having downloaded a plethora of choices for wallowing from Home Alone and Love Actually to It’s a Wonderful Life (“Teacher says, every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings”) however when I got up this morning the sky was the most glorious pembe (pink) and that glorious colour made it virtually impossible for me to wallow when the universe has been so good to me.
Sure maybe there is no Christmas ham but today is Wednesday so perhaps I can make lamachun.
There are no Christmas carols but today is Wednesday and the ezan (Call to Prayer) will still summon the Muslim faithful 6 times a day. A hauntingly beautiful sound that has become my alarm clock, so to speak. I need to be up at 5:42 to get Daughter ready for school. The 1:12 ezan reminds me to prepare lunch and the 5:07 means I can open a bottle of wine (although mildly inappropriate). The 8:21 ezan is my Hurley Dog’s reminder for a quick walk before bed (yes he hears it and runs to the door). The 10:08 tells me to get ready for bed and if I am awake at 3:38 it is like a lullaby to my ears I when hear the chant.
I may not be able to swim down at Manly Beach after a family Christmas banquet or go for a dip in the neighbour’s pool after a delicious BBQ but today is Wednesday so Daughter and I will go and spend some time with her Grandmother before taking my Hurley Dog for a walk through the village (maybe stopping by the butcher for a nice juicy Wednesday bone). Today is a ‘balmy’ 17 degrees and although there has been a fresh fall of snow on the mountains behind us it is still rather pleasant for the middle of winter.
So perhaps some might say I am being Scrooged by not having a Christmas celebration but do I miss the traffic on Christmas morning? No. Do I miss the potential for family drama? Not at all. Do I miss the commercialism of Christmas? Bah humbug I say! So what am I missing out on? I’ve got The Turk and I’ve got Daughter. I’ve got my Hurley Dog and my Kedi Cat and a bucket load of Turkish family. Is not every day Christmas Day?
And yes as you can see Daughter did get to open a couple of little presents – even if my Hurley Dog tried to open them himself.
So to my family and friends around the world have a wonderful day (Wednesday) and a Merry Christmas. Enjoy the ham.